GRIPES

Yes, I've got some. I guess it is the right of old guys like myself to complain once in a while. So what's got my shorts in a bunch, other than the fact that I am overweight? Let's see: a group of five women and girls, sitting near me at the movie theater, after I have committed a significant amount to take myself and three boys to see a flick, who decide to loudly converse and take phone calls and tweet and walk back and forth as if they are in their livingroom. Despite what I am sure were intense eyeballs of hate aimed at them, and then a rather stern admonition for them to shut the hell up, they only managed to tone down their interruptions to barely ignorable. What could be done, I don't know, but it sure was getting my back up.

Panhandlers inside of restaurants. It is bad enough that in Columbia one often has to wade through a phalanx of bums while trying to enter eating establishments, but having them come up to your table? Not right. Especially irritating when I have on occasion been turned down---yes, turned down---when I offered to purchase a meal deal, because they wanted cash. Conclusion, you can't get beer with a big mac. The area around where I work at times looks like a weird ocean scene with small black bags reminiscent of jellyfish floating, used by the local convenience store when they sell beer. Of course, the storeowners love it, or why would they offer 50 cent beer and little glass vials with miniature flowers inside that everyone knows are used as crack pipes?

I would include recent revelations about my wife, God protect her, but will leave that for different venues.

Why do moped drivers---or as I like to think of them, DUI bikes---not have to be licenced? I may be wrong, but I don't think they have to be tagged either, but they are taking up and using the same road I drive on. I don't necessarily dislike moped drivers per se, and I realize it is an economical alternative, but if you aren't allowed a license because you are uninsurable or often incapable of piloting a car, why should you be allowed to motor on the streets on any vehicle?

Drivers in left-hand turn lane who refuse to pull out into the intersection.

Sports radio announcers who have now incorported personal ads within their commentary, which is irritating as hell. Even moreso when there are three or more talking heads. The traditional commercials are still in place. And while I'm at it, the product placement sponsorship and commercial plugs attached to almost every action in a ballgame: and JT slides in safely, that slide brought to you by P & J Slide Builders; and he goes down swinging, so don't strike out, buy blah blah blah; it's a fly ball into the seats, and while you're think of seating, think . . . You know what I mean, if you listen to any sports on radio.

Trailers that practically show you the entire movie, including some of the most interesting shots, and others that hint at important spoilers.

When authors write like this: "the most important being John Major. John Major began his career. . ." I see this construction ALL THE DAMN time and it drives me crazy.

Ok, I feel much better. Was getting a bit grumpy there.